Me: I'm not domesticated. I'm still a wild kitty. He just leaves food on the porch for me occasionally.
Katie: Don't make me wear an ugly dress at your wedding.
Me: I'm not having a big wedding. I'm having the most epic pool party ever.
Katie: Sweet.
-On Ferrel Brides
"I'm pretty much a big deal, so go get me some fucking sprinkles." -On baked goods.
The Boy: Not everyone will make you cookies you know.
Me: Yeah, yeah. (pause)Not everyone will change who they are as a person to make you happy, you know.
The Boy: Yeah, yeah.
-On compromise
Lauren: Tom Brady is a lecterous man-whore!
Me: Peyton Manning looks like someone slapped him the face with a cast iron skillet.
(pause)
Chris: Aren't you gonna say something?
Lauren: No, no, she's right.
-On Quarter Backs Me: Peyton Manning looks like someone slapped him the face with a cast iron skillet.
(pause)
Chris: Aren't you gonna say something?
Lauren: No, no, she's right.
"I honestly think that if Mike Green couldn't play tomorrow, the caps would lose. Not because he's the only shot at winning, which he is, but beacuse Stacie would go to the devil and demand her soul back. And the devil would give it to her, you know why? 'cause he's fucking scared of her. Fucking scared."
-On Loyalty
Stacie: So is she your girlfriend now?
Cousin Sloane: I dunno. She calls me like all the time.
Stacie: Well they will do that sometimes.
Cousin Slaone: It doesn't mean I want to talk to her.
-On avoiding the question as well as the "girlfriend"
K: Aww, D, look there's a squirrel out our window!
D: Oh my gosh! I think it's dead!
Stacie: No, it's just sleeping!
K: I don't think squirrels sleep.
Stacie: Of course squirrels sleep. That's why they're so mellow, otherwise fighting over a Pop-Tart would turn into a hate crime!
-On Wildlife